Discover how to strike a healthy balance between individualism and collective identity in today’s pushy, opinionated world. Learn key insights from the evolutionary psychologist Gad Saad to celebrate your individuality.
Do you sometimes feel like a square peg in a round hole world?
Or perhaps like a zebra strutting through a field of horses — close, yet not quite fitting in, right?
You’re not alone. Many of us struggle with wanting to wave our unique, quirky “this is me flag.” But instead we wind up feeling pulled towards blending in with the crowd.
It’s a classic tale of “individuality” meeting up with the urge to conform with the “collective consciousness.”
And this topic is becoming more relevant than ever in today’s pushy, opinionated internet world, where we are constantly being bombarded by the collective consciousness of the opinions of the masses.
No worries. I’m here to help.
In this article we will delve deep into finding that elusive balance between maintaining your individuality while harmonizing with a broader community.
I’ll be drawing from the rich insights of Gad Saad, a renowned evolutionary psychologist and the author of “The Parasitic Mind: How Infectious Ideas Are Killing Common Sense .”
Together we will explore the pathways to strike a balance between individualism and collective identity.
I’m writing this article because I’m a leading Behavioral Change Expert, and founder of The Anxiety Cure Course – which is a therapist-recommended online program.
I am committing to helping people to live their most fulfilling lives.
Imagine walking down a bustling street wearing a bright pink hat adorned with little, twinkling stars. It’s bold, it’s brave, it’s unapologetically you.
That is individualism in a nutshell.
Individualism is the freedom to embrace your quirks, your preferences, and strut down the pathway of life to the beat of your own drum.
Now picture a harmonious flash mob, where everyone moves in a rhythm, creating a beautiful spectacle of unity, a tapestry woven with threads of common values, shared visions, and mutual understandings.
This is the essence of collective identity.
It’s about being a part of something bigger, a community where you find familiarity, a sense of belonging, and a comforting resonance with others.
To foster a balance between these two concepts, we turn to Gad Saad’s evolutionary perspective which educates us on the primal need for both individual expression and social harmony.
How do we find this delicate balance?
First of all, Gad Saad encourages people to approach the lure of the comfort of the collective identity with a “critical mind.”
You must be fully aware of the potential pitfalls of conforming too much… and thereby losing your sense of self.
This means you must prioritize “awareness” and “discernment” …so you nurture your unique spirit… while also staying open to becoming inspired by other people’s ideas.
Sounds complicated? No worries. I’m going to explain everything – in simple terms – with some simple steps.
Coming up I’m going to explain how to explore the delicate dance between being your loud, proud self and being a harmonious member of a group.
In a way this process works sort of like a tango, where the sensual moves of individuality intertwine gracefully with the collective rhythm, creating a dance that’s both personal and shared.
Okay… so all of this sounds philosophically wonderful, right? Here’s how to take these ideas and put them into action.
Take some time to get to know yourself better through introspection. Regularly schedule “me-time.” Think of this like a hot date…. with yourself!
Maybe it’s a quiet half-hour with a cup of tea, where you ask yourself questions you would typically ask someone you care about. “What made me happy today?” “What am I proud of?” Getting in touch with your feelings and desires is the foundation for authentic individualism.
Example: Every Sunday evening, sit down with your favorite beverage and jot down what you loved and didn’t love about your week, and what you wish for in the coming week.
Every now and then, take a leap of faith and voice your unique perspective, even if it means standing alone. Embrace those solo moments as opportunities to shine and grow.
Example: If you have a different solution to a problem at work, don’t be afraid to speak up in a meeting. Your fresh perspective might just be what everyone didn’t know they were waiting for.
Dive headfirst into the beautiful mosaic of human experience by exposing yourself to different cultures, philosophies, and ways of life. It not only enhances your understanding of the world, but also deepens your individuality.
Example: Attend a festival, workshop, or seminar about a culture or philosophy you know little about. Take notes, ask questions, immerse yourself in the experience.
Pen down a personal philosophy that embraces diversity while championing your individuality. This philosophy will be your guiding light, helping you navigate life’s twisting paths with integrity and authenticity.
Example: Write a mission statement for your life, including the values that are most important to you and the personal boundaries that help you maintain those values. Refer to this statement in times of dilemma to make choices that resonate with your true self.
Add your own unique flavor to your community. Engage actively and offer your distinctive strengths and talents to enrich the community you are a part of.
Example: Volunteer for a local initiative or start a community project leveraging your unique skills. If you are an artist, offer to paint a mural in your community space. If you’re good with numbers, offer to help neighbors with budgeting advice.
Don’t forget to celebrate your uniqueness. Treat yourself for the small wins and be proud of the individual landmarks you achieve.
Example: Reached a personal goal? Treat yourself to something you enjoy – be it a nice meal, a day off, or a small gift to yourself.
As we wrap up this conversation, remember, life doesn’t always have to be a tough choice between strutting solo or blending into a group. Sometimes, it can be a delightful tango where you gracefully move between leading and following… honoring your individuality while respecting the collective rhythm.
It’s perfectly fine to strut around in your metaphorical pink hat while joining the metaphorical flash mob from time to time. It’s all about finding that sweet spot where “me” meets “we.”
If you need extra support to reclaim your individuality, let’s chat. Work with me in 1 on 1 coaching sessions to strengthen your mindset. And explore my therapist recommended program The Anxiety Cure Online Course.
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