Are narcissists happy? Do wrong doers and bullies feel happiness – after wreaking unhappiness wherever they go? Do narcissists suffer? Check out this interesting research!
I’ve often wondered if the people who have “done me wrong” have gone on to feel happiness in their lives – or if they ever feel guilt, remorse and self-loathing because of their behavior.
Basically, do “wrong-doers” feel any kind of “emotional consequence” because of their cruel behavior?
I’ve written about how I was betrayed by a younger girl who I mentored and helped to publish her first book.
She turned out to be an All-About-Eve type of gal – who lied and ripped me off – illegally (and immorally) breaking our signed contract.
Although I have done the inner-work to move on, we share a lot of friends in common, and so, over time, our mutual friends have shared a wide range of personal stories of betrayal by this same All-About-Eve-Gal!
There’s obviously something broken inside of All-About-Eve-Gal – if she keeps breaking contracts, commitments and hearts.
At this point, All-About-Eve-Gal is now successful in her career – thanks to climbing up the broken pieces of various contracts, commitments and hearts.
All-About-Eve-Gal’s life looks happy on the outside.
But is she really happy on the inside?
After all, can she really be happy with herself – when she knows she had to harm so many people to get to where she is in her career?
I’ve also wondered if the Prince Harmings in my life have endured any “emotional consequences” after behaving so badly.
I have some good news for Karma Seekers – a fascinating answer – found in a recent study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology – all about whether mean, toxic people feel happiness.
According to this recent study, there’s a big difference between “happiness” and “fulfillment.”
The difference between these 2 categories can affect if someone feels “shallow, fleeting happiness” or a “deeper, more meaningful happiness.”
In this recent study, researchers found that this “shallow happiness” is characterized by following animal urges to satisfy one’s desires.
Shallow happiness is more about immediate gratification.
In contrast, “fulfillment” is a “deeper happiness.”
Guess what? Researchers found that people who pursue “fulfillment” experience a deeper, more meaningful happiness – compared to people who simply pursue “shallow happiness”!
To be specific…
Researchers found that people who are “givers” (fulfillment-directed people who are soul-directed/growth-directed) wind up feeling a “deeper, more lasting joy” than people who are “takers” (shallow-happiness-directed folks – who are ego-directed).
A career wrong-doer is willing to impulsively grab and take and trample over others to succeed.
They’re focused on pleasing themselves first and foremost- and not at all focused on living with meaning and purpose.
As a result, the wrong-doer will never feel truly satisfied.
Basically, because the wrong-doer does not value high integrity and hard work they will never get to experience the “deeper and longer-lasting happiness” known as “fulfillment.”
A love wrong-doer is focused on experiencing as much lust as possible.
They are thereby willing to impulsively take, take, take – in order to satisfy their primal urges.
As a result, the wrong-doer might get to experience a “shallow pleasure” – but will never feel truly satisfied.
Basically, because the wrong-doer does not value intimacy and connection they will not experience true soul fulfillment in love.
It’s funny how there’s a lot of talk about the importance of “the pursuit of happiness.”
But we don’t talk about the “pursuit of fulfillment.”
Meanwhile – fulfillment is where the deepest happiness can be found!
Plus, pursuing fulfillment is something unique to us humans – which other animals on this planet are not privy to.
We humans must recognize and honor our human uniqueness!
We get to experience a deeper sense of meaning and purpose.
The answer: Not in the truest sense of deep happiness.
In fact, we should all feel a bit sorry for our wrong-doers.
I’d love for all of us humans to become more mindfully aware of our unique human perk – that we get to enjoy the “pursuit of fulfillment.”
I will give you video training (in convenient 3 – 10 minute videos) to help you create better boundaries. I’ll even help you create 1 electric fence – to protect against highly toxic people.
Learn more here.