Some might call it a miracle. I had my baby very late in life. Here’s my story! I hope it inspires hope in YOU – to tap into the power of belief to stay committed to pursuing what you want!
Over a decade ago, I had a mystical encounter in the laundry room of the Chelsea apartment building I used to live in.
But first, let me give you a quick capsule summary not only of where I was living at that time – but where I was “at.”
I was single, in my 40’s, and feeling a lot like that famous Roy Lichtenstein painting – with the woman slapping her forehead – a thought bubble floating above, saying: “I can’t believe I forgot to have children!”
I remember it was a Sunday evening. I’d just gotten off the phone with my friend Lisa, sharing how frustrated I was with my disappointing dating life.
She tried to encourage me to believe in a world where I was happily coupled with an adorable child. But I was NOT buying it.
I thanked her. Then I decided the best choice was to simply quiet my Heavy Longing – and give up on this dream.
Next, I headed to the laundry room to organize my dry clothes into categorical piles: Yoga pants. Underwear. Sheets.
Suddenly I found myself confused. There entwined with one of my g-strings was a teeny tiny tee shirt – a little white one – the size of one of my hands.
I wondered: Had I super-shrunk one of my tees to this miniscule size?
I then realized: Nope. This was an infant’s tee shirt – accidentally left behind in the building’s dryer by a bleary-eyed tired mother.
I remember thinking how dimension-wise my little g-string and this mini baby tee shirt made sense as a garment duo.
Although as far as my life was concerned, the latter clothing morsel made no sense in my laundry at all.
I closely examined this baby tee in the fluorescent laundry room light.
It pained my heart to look at it.
I wanted a baby soooooo badly.
I wondered: Was this baby tee meant to serve as a little mystically sent epsom salts for my fatigued inner spirit. Was it meant to serve as a wake up call for my Heavy Longing – making sure my soul’s truest desires did not go to sleep?
Was this baby tee meant to stop me in my tracks and remind me: “Yo Karen! You know you want a loving partner and child! So you must tap into the power of belief that you will get this! And you must keep on searching!”
I know that’s a pretty grand message to come from such a mini tee. But that’s how I interpreted receiving this lost item.
I confess: I kept that baby tee shirt. Yep, I stashed it in my laundry basket – then brought it straight to my apartment. I looked at it frequently – to purposefully remind myself of my heart’s Heavy Longing – whenever faith was lagging.
Thanks to that tiny tee I began to tell all the men I dated – on the second date – that I only wanted to get involved with someone who wanted a family.
It was this decisive screening process that ultimately empowered me to find a loving partner who was passionate about both me and starting a family.
In December 2009 I found out I was pregnant – thanks to the miracle of IVF.
Now here I am: December 2014. I’m preparing to celebrate the new year with my happy little family. My “two handsomes,” as I call my sweetie and my sweet son.
It’s funny how life works. How one overly fatigued mother’s laundry mistake could create such a ripple affect.
That tiny tee encouraged me to upgrade my faith – thereby upgrade my dating habits – thereby create new life to boot.
I kept tapping in The Power of Belief, even when what I was seeking to find felt like a wildly moving target.
It’s also important to note that if I’m giving credit where credit is due, that I must also thank the Power Of Right Action. After all, I didn’t just say affirmations – I did affirmative actions.
I put in the effort and bravery to tell men up front about my truest desires.
Although I was nervous at first, I chose to clearly state how I wanted a loving, committed partnership – and child.
And I even said this when it felt tough to say out loud.
Plus you must tap into The Power of Right Action (which includes The Power of Effort, The Power Of Courage and The Power of Patience).
You must ensure your thoughts, words and behavior are aimed in the direction of your Heavy Longing.
Please notice and celebrate any and all small milestones.
Look for clues to what you’re doing right – and doing wrong.
Learn from everything.
Thomas Edison said that famous quote – how he didn’t fail all those 10,000 times he tried to invent the lightbulb. He just found 10,000 ways which didn’t work. And learned from each of them.
Well, that was me – with the men I was dating.
I consciously chose to learn as much as I could from each attempted relationship. Then I dusted myself off, and kept on searching.
Recently my now 4 year old son (Ari Salmansohn) said to me, “Mommy, I’m so glad I found you!”
Yes, he said that he found me!
I smiled, thinking about this idea:
My mind floated back to that fateful evening in the laundry room.
I was almost ready to stop seeking my Heavy Longing.
Now here I was, with this amazing child!
“I’m so glad you found me too,” I told my son, hugging him tightly. “I was looking for you everywhere – now here you are!”