10 Toxic Phrases Insecure People Use and How to Replace Them

Learn the top toxic phrases that are used by insecure people and how to swap them for more empowering self talk.

Feeling insecure is like trying to drive a car with a flat tire. It slows you down, takes you off course, and if you don’t address it, can lead to a more significant breakdown.

Insecurity is that relentless heckler in the audience of your mind, constantly throwing jabs at your self-worth, questioning your decisions, and amplifying your self-doubts.

Everyone has been there at some point. You? Me? That ultra-confident-looking colleague? Yep, them too! We’ve all danced with insecurity, some more intimately than others. No worries! I’m here to help!

I’m sharing this article because I’m a leading Behavioral Change Coach with a passion for understanding the human psyche.

I wrote the bestselling book “Think Happy” and founded The Anxiety Cure – which is a therapist-recommended online program.

The good news? Recognizing these toxic phrases that insecure people use is the first step to healing.

I’m going to explain what they are – and how to actively replace them with more empowering ones. This process is your highway to a more confident self.

10 Toxic Phrases Insecure People Use and How to Replace Them

The phrases you unconsciously use can be a mirror to your inner insecurities. Recognizing and replacing these phrases can set the foundation for a more confident, self-assured you. Let’s start to unpack them now.

1. “I’m just lucky.”

Why it’s toxic: It diminishes accomplishments, attributing success purely to external factors.

Swap with: “I’ve worked hard for this.” Because you have, and it’s time to own it.

2. “I’m such an idiot.”

Why it’s toxic: It’s a blanket negative statement that erodes self-worth over time.

Swap with: “I made a mistake, I’ll learn from it.” Embrace growth over self-degradation.

3. “It’s all my fault.”

Why it’s toxic: Over-internalizing blame can make you an easy target for guilt and manipulation.

Swap with: “I accept my part, let’s figure out how to make it right.” Shared responsibility is key.

4. “No one cares about me.”

Why it’s toxic: It amplifies feelings of loneliness and can blind you to genuine affection from others.

Swap with: “I’m feeling overlooked right now.” Making it about the moment, not your entirety.

5. “I can’t do anything right.”

Why it’s toxic: It turns one setback into a universal truth, which is rarely accurate.

Swap with: “I messed up this time, but I’ve succeeded before.” A reminder of your capabilities.

6. “They’re better than me.”

Why it’s toxic: Constant comparison can create a hierarchy where you’re always at the bottom.

Swap with: “They’re good at that; I have my strengths too.” Appreciating diversity in skills.

7. “I’m not worth it.”

Why it’s toxic: This phrase is a direct hit to self-value. Believing this can limit opportunities and joy.

Swap with: “I have my unique value and deserve happiness.” Because guess what? You do.

8. “Why would anyone choose me?”

Why it’s toxic: Doubting your worth in relationships can lead to settling for less.

Swap with: “I bring a lot to the table.” Recognizing your value in any relationship.

9. “I should just keep quiet.”

Why it’s toxic: Suppressing your voice based on insecurity stifles genuine communication.

Swap with: “My perspective is valid, and I’ll share it.” Speak with intention.

10. “Everyone’s judging me.”

Why it’s toxic: Assuming negative judgments heightens anxiety and affects how you present yourself.

Swap with: “I can’t control others’ thoughts, only how I react.” Prioritize self-perception over perceived judgments.

Recap on Phrases Insecure People Use

Insecurities can be both sneaky and overpowering. But by recognizing these phrases and consciously replacing them, you can start rewriting your life’s narrative. If you want further support to boost your self esteem, work with me in 1 on 1 coaching sessions to strengthen your mindset. And check out my therapist recommended program The Anxiety Cure.