Married more than once? Lessons Learned From an Anthropologist

married more than once

Are you married more than once – or nervous to date someone who was? Here is an interesting perspective by Margaret Mead, famed cultural anthropologist.

Margaret Mead, famed American cultural anthropologist, suggested that we should all have three marriages in our lifetime.

  • The first for love
  • The second for parenting
  • The third for companionship

Basically, Mead was suggesting that we match up our love lives with our different developmental stages at different ages.

According to Mead we shouldn’t be too judgmental on ourselves for the mistakes we might have made in love in our 20’s, 30’s, 40’s etc…

We were simply choosing partners for that specific stage in our life.

Mead’s philosophies on love and marriage were inspired from her own life.

She was interviewed before her death, and asked about the failure of her 3 marriages. ”

“What failure?” Mead responded. “I had three successful marriages for three different developmental periods of my life.”

If you’re married more than once…

According to Mead, you should feel perfectly okay about multiple marriages.

We humans are built for different kinds of love at different stages in our live.

And if we marry more than once, it’s to satisfy where we are in our development.

I can relate to what Mead shares. But I confess I’m a bit of a romantic. In my ideal world, I’d love to find one longterm, loyal soulmate – who is able to satisfy all 3 out of 3 of these developmental needs.

I know when I was in the frame of mind of wanting to raise a child, I looked for different things in a partner than when I was in college.

Plus, the older I get, the more I appreciate having a partner who feels like a companion – a true best friend.

Nowadays in my 50’s, I don’t need the same romantic fanfare I reveled in when I was in my 20’s.

These days when I go out on a date with my partner, I’ve swapped getting all gussied up in high heels for dressing down and wearing low heeled walking shoes.

My idea of a good time is strolling around New York City, hand in hand, looking for a new good restaurant to sit in and quietly catch up about our day.

Looking to marry again?

I’m giving away free ebooks of my Oprah recommended relationship book, Prince Harming Syndrome – which applies equally to Prince Harming and Princess Harmings.

Think happier. Think calmer.

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