Going through a challenging time? Spend time with your hive!

According to my favorite philosopher buddy, Ari (otherwise known as Aristotle ), we humans are biologically social animals. Our first nature is to be around people.

However if you're going through a challenging time (aka: a break up, a work rejection, a money problem, a trauma, a difficult illness, the passing of a loved one) often being around people feels much more like a 2,841st nature.

You gotta fight this urge to hide away.

In my new BOUNCE BACK BOOK (which you can find out more about here) I share research which shows it’s far more healthful to be around people.

Dr. Dina Carbonell, a research associate at Simmons College, studied the secrets of people who successfully bounced back from hard times. She tracked 400 people for 25 years, from ages 5 to 30, studying the main characteristics of those who did best in difficult circumstances.

Her findings?

“Resilient people identify those who are available, trustworthy and helpful. Then they go towards this light,” says Dr. Carbonell.

In psychologist Professor Ed Diener’s research he’s found that close relationships actually influence overall joy far more than income! And good strong friendships can even ward off germs – by lowering stress, and improving your immune system.

A Bingingham University study dittos these findings -- reporting people who claim to have 5 or more friends with whom they can discuss important problems, are 60% more likely to say that they are “very happy.”

According to Dr. John Haidt the urge for humans to seek the sweetness of other people is just as natural and strong as bees who migrate towards a honey hive. Haidt believes we humans, just like bees, feel the most comfortable and thriving when we are members of a larger hive. Hence why many folks feel so unsettled and lost when alone too often, without the comfort of others.

So if you want to feel at the top of your game, it’s essential to spend time buzzing around with supportive people!

Your Assignment:

Make sure you are playing the right amount of hide and seek! Figure out who your sweet hive people might be. Make a list of all the people you consider close friends. Now ask yourself: Who is 100% rooting for you to live your happiest life – and not competing or jealous? Who do you always feel happier after visiting – not more depressed? These are your your supportive hive people. Go towards these hive people often! Let them know how much you appreciate them often -- and your hive will further thrive!

Remember: One of the indirectly good things about going through bad times – it can bring you closer to others, bonding you in a truly emotionally, meaningful way!

The Paradoxical Commandments

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

3. If you are successful, you win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

4. The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

7. People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

9. People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

I just discovered the above Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent Keith in researching for my BOUNCE BACK BOOK. I've invited the author to come on my Sirius show BE HAPPY DAMMIT -- and will definitely let you know when that will be.

If you have your favorite quotes which keep you inspired during challenging times, please share them below!

WARNING: Obstacles to joy appear larger than they truly are during crisis!

ANNOUNCING A NEW SEMINAR!

THE BOUNCE BACK SEMINAR!

Monday, June 18th at 7pm at THE SOHO HOUSE in NYC!

A bad breakup. A serious illness. The loss of a job. The death of a parent. Life has a habit of throwing people curveballs.

To which I say: "When life throws you curveballs, hit them out of the park!"

My newest Bounce Back Seminar is jampacked with an inspiring collection of top resilience tips from happiness research, psychological studies, Greek philosophy, nutrition and exercise experts, and more!

So if you're presently trying to overcome a challenge - absolutely come to my inspiring Bounce Back Seminar -- and learn all the latest research tips on how to bounce back happier, stronger, better than ever before!

WHEN: June 18th at 7pm

WHERE: The Soho House, 9th Ave. between 13th and 14th St.

FEE: $35.00 by paypal at my site $45.00 at the door

BONUS: 1 FREE WEEK AT YOGAWORKS, FIZZY LIZZIE BEVERAGE, CHOCOLATE FRETZELS (yum, yum!), SEPHORA FREEBIES,2 BELLES LINGERIE, and PERVARTISTRY GAMES!

PLUS A RAFFLE: Win all kinds of goodies like a FREE TRAINING SESSION with my amazing personal trainer, Josh Margolis, who owns/runs NYC'S acclaimed MIND OVER MATTER (Pssst...if you're looking for a trainer...Joshua Margolis is fab! He's got a Bachelors Degree in Sports Psychology. He holds certifications from A.C.E., A.I.F.E., and N.A.S.M, and is also prenatal and postpartum fitness certified. Joshua has been working in the health and fitness arena for over 5 years designing personalized fitness programs which incorporate motivational techniques to enhance performance. His fitness philosophy: "Your self image and habits go hand in hand; change one and you will automatically change the other.")

QUICKIE GOOD NEWS: One of my research studies reports that bad events happily come with a bad memory. Post-bad-times not only do most people rebound back to their average happiness level - but often bounce back to even higher-than-usual good moods! Psychologists believe this bounce back up-up-upper affect is due to people re- appreciating all the good they have in their life.

ASAP Bounce Back Assignment: Write a Gratitude List. Who do you love? What do you love? Pay more attention to these people and things, and you'll be on your way to jumpstarting happiness ASAP.

RSVP NOW THRU PAY PAL BY CLICKING HERE AND LOOKING IN THE LEFT HAND COLUMN!