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Living in the past is like driving forward while staring in the rear view mirror.     Believing is seeing.     Be an over-fright success story.     One's actions convince louder than one's words.     Make progress. Make new mistakes.     All work and no play makes Jill want to reach for the Prozac.     The purpose of your life is to find the purpose of your life. It doesn't matter how fast you get there if you're heading in the wrong direction.     If at first you don't succeed, you're doing something stupid.     You're nobody until somebody hates you.     Behind every successful woman is someone who pissed her off.     To get where you need to go you must first see who you really are.     Be a warrior, not a worrier.     Be a winner, not a whiner.     If the coyote had stopped to catch his breath, he might have caught the roadrunner.     A pack of puppies led by a pitbull will always be feared more than a pack of pitbulls led by a puppy.     Brainpower is as important as horsepower. Read, read, read!     You should always pick a job for its passion value not cash-in value.     Don't let a blame preoccupation ruin your occupation.     It's always better to go for longterm greed over short term greed.     A shortcut is often the longest distance between two points.     Time is money...and time wasters are money wasters.     Don't wait to make heaps and heaps of cash to have heaps and heaps of fun.     Every member of the Fortune 500 Club could also be a member of the Misfortune 500 Club.     Money doesn't bring you true happiness...but happiness can bring you true money. If you love what you do, the money will come.     Whatever business you're in you're in the people business.     Fail Faster. Succeed faster.     Behind every successful woman is someone who pissed her off.     Follow the fuscia brick road.   Failure is in many ways like "fullure" - it is always full of lessons to be learned.     Believe in a laughter life.     Don't let your convictions become your restrictions.     Invest in "Fresh Air Fun." Take a walk outside once a day.     If you want your body to be smoking, you've got to stop smoking.     Sometimes, all you gotta do is ask. Duh.     Taking no action is an action. Duh.     Happiness is not about what happens to you -- but about how you choose to respond to what happens.     Comedy = tragedy + 3 months and/or 3 margaritas!     Practice that tongue twister "NO" today.     Take the fat out of your fate. Slim down your schedule to what matters.     It's not just what you know...but what you do with what you know.     The grass is greener on the other side - until you get there and see it's astroturf.     When you grow - you often outgrow.     The only constant is change.     You are a human being, not a human was or a human will be.     Self honesty is the only path to happiness.     Sometimes we're "mad at" someone whom we should merely be "sad at."     Be so proactive you're preactive.     Fast doesn't always last.     Love is a boomerang. What have you and give away is what you get back.     Fear of commitment: it could happen to you...or someone you can't love.     Saying difficult things now is better than fixing even more difficult problems later.     It is better to have loved and lost - than to live with a psycho for the rest of your life.     It is better to have loved and lost - and had some really amazing hot sex - than never to have lived and loved at all.     A man is not a project. A man is a man. And a project is a project.     It's better to have a short bad relationship than a long bad relationship.     It's worth it to hold out for a soul mate and not settle for a cellmate.     Assess breeds success.     Turn all bad experiences into good inperiences - take them in fully, and change in a positive way.    
 

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Want to know what breaks up nearly every relationship in this world?



I can tell you in Three Acts:

ACT ONE: You hurt me.

ACT TWO: I hurt you.

ACT THREE: You hurt me even more because I just hurt you so I hurt you even more then you hurt me then I hurt you then you hurt me then I hurt you, etc…

The point: It’s easy to act cold/hurtful/stonewalling to someone who you feel has said or done something you perceive as cold/hurtful/stonewalling to you.

But that’s the point. THAT’S the EASY thing to do.

An ex-boyfriend of mine, Eric Gertler, once told me, "People as a species aren't for the most part mean or evil. They're just WEAK."

How true.

It takes EFFORT to consciously, openly, bravely, warmly speak up about the hurt you feel -- AT THE SPEED OF LIFE -- instead of acting out and letting things spiral negatively downward.

Yes, it takes EFFORT to take the high road, and to express your vulnerabilities and concerns with warmth and candor.

But this effort is worth it...because love and connection are your truest sources for happiness.

So next time someone you care about does something that you feel isn't very caring at all -- put in the effort -- the bravery -- TO SPEAK UP AT THE SPEED OF LIFE -- and kill that relatioship monster while it's still small.

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posted by KAREN SALMANSOHN at 12:15 AM

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